BSA

I have always loved the boy scouts. My ex was (and still is) really involved, as well as his family, and I gained a lot of insight into the organization. They do really, really great things, and have the potential to make some great men. At this time, Alec is currently spending his summers taking groups of young men on week long camping trips, where they kayak, rock climb, cave, and repel, among lots of other really cool physically strenuous activities.

If you haven't kept up with what's going on in BSA right now, google it. It's too hard to find an unbiased source, or I would find one for you, but you really need to read a few to get an idea of what's happening.

    
I can tell you based on experience, these (above) people rock. Leaders of a group can not always serve as representatives to the members- so while I refer to it as "BSA", I'm thinking of those people in charge, not the caring and responsible boys I met at Custaloga Town.



Basically, they are holding on to the original policy that gay people are not allowed to join.  Which I just have so, so many feelings about, and after talking about it with our resident Eagle scout, have decided:

1. BSA is a private club, just like a fraternity, or the elks club, or anything else. They have the right to decide who and who is not permitted in their group, just like I am not allowed to join Alpha Kappa Alpha (an african american sorority).

• A lot of people are confused on the whys of their choosing this- it has a lot less to do with finances (although, Alec said this would be a huge deal), and more with religious beliefs. The boyscouts are teaching men to lead a Christian life [edit: they don't teach "christian" ideals specifically, but to be a member you do have to follow a religion, so no agnostics or atheists], with those religious morals and values. In my eyes, this is just another example of the church's problems with homosexuality. Perhaps we could make an Episcopalian boyscout group? :) Either way, the real issue is that they think homosexuals are bad people that don't apply to the moral code BSA tries to keep.

2. While it would cost  more to accommodate openly gay men, I don't think it is nearly as big of a deal as everyone is saying. I realize it would be a change, and that would be hard at first. But there are women on staff, and they just have separate tents. It would not be impossible. I think excluding an entire group because it would be hard or expensive if pretty lame, actually.

• I don't hold to the idea that every gay person is a pervert, and we need to protect the straight men and keep them separated. That's ridiculous. However, gay people are different than straight people, if only in that one little aspect. I don't think that's bad- but just like I would expect special accommodations because I'm a women, I think it's fair not just for the straight men, but for the gay ones too, to ask for separate lodging. They are special, and should be treated that way. My mother always said the most unfair thing you can do is treat everyone the same. I can't imagine how hard it would be at that age, and how uncomfortable it would be, if I had to sleep in a tent with boys. Realizing I'm not a gay teen going through puberty, maybe I'm off track here, but it just seems like it could save a lot of stress and angst. 

3. I think it royally stinks that a group that carries it's men from age 6 to 18, and then into adulthood, would bring sexuality into it as a certain standard they look for.  How many 6 year olds know their sexual preferences? Are you seriously suggesting that they can join, and they are good people, up until 12 or 13 when they become more self aware, and in that case they have to leave? There is enough humiliation and rejection during the middle school years, and so it seems doubly sad that they will be starting that part of their life with rejection not just from their peers, but from the adults that they were looking up to. This part is what enrages me more than anything.




I think maybe it's the culture that I hate the most. I understand wanting to know if your child is going on a camping trip with a gay adult- just like you might want to know if it is a woman. But that's where I draw the line. Because I don't think anyone should be ashamed of their sexuality, and no one has any right judging it. So sure, maybe they might want to know- but not because it matters. Truly, how big of a deal would it be for a mother to take a bunch of boys on a camping trip? Little to none, because you think of a mother as nurturing, and protective. So...why can't a gay dad be, too? Since when was sexuality an indication of perversion? To me, it's as important as gender. It exists, but it doesn't dictate who you are.

Alec and I agree, in the next few generations a lot of this will be phased out. In the meantime, all you can do is continue to act as a role model to show people that you will still be an open and loving individual, and hope that they will follow you in that path. That's what I'll be doing. I don't hate the boy scouts- they do some really, really great things. I think it's sad that they have such a black mark on an otherwise great organization, that I was proud of loving. But I do hope that they grow out of this when the rest of the world does.


I believe in growing out of old prejudices, and working towards, rather than rejecting, harmony in society.