I came across this today, and while I normally tend to roll my eyes at elitedaily posts, this one was exactly what I needed. So instead of writing my own post, I'm linking this:
Down The Rabbit Hole: Stop Making Self-Destruction A Cure For Boredom
Saturday, August 29, 2015
Tuesday, August 25, 2015
A list
Stores in Austintown that sell Chips, but not Cheesy Popcorn:
- Marc's
- Save-a-Lot
- Dollar General
- Dollar Tree
- Big Lots
- Kmart
Just a Few Things
1) When visiting your parents for a weekend, you should always bring your glasses in case you trip and fall into a Harry Potter book. Once that happens, you have committed to rereading the whole series, but your brain will not forgive you if you try to marathon through them without corrective eye-wear.
2) This year was a little less sad when I didn't get to go back to school, but only because I feel more confident that someday I WILL go back and life is flexible and things aren't for never.
3) This confidence was slightly shaken by the small hiccough in dental insurance that does not want to pay for all that work I had done in February (before I went off my parent's insurance). A few things I realized during last night's ordeal:
A. I am a responsible adult who has saved money in case of emergencies like this.
B. But I am still a poor responsible adult, and this bill sucks up half of everything I saved over this year.
C. Oh god, I am never going to stop owing someone money and I will never go to grad school and I will spend the rest of my life wearing broken sunglasses and eating stale bread from Marc's.
D. Becky and Dave Greene will not let me starve to death and they can probably help fix this.
4) The above scenario also helped me realize that, while I haven't noticed a huge difference in my new medicine, it must be doing something for me because if I forget to take it I cry a lot about trivial things. Like dogs being at the pound, or important Harry Potter related decision-making, and dental bills.
5) Ryan Kish lives so close to me right now, and we are making traditions and this next year will be much better than the last. Which everyone promised me. So cheers to that.
2) This year was a little less sad when I didn't get to go back to school, but only because I feel more confident that someday I WILL go back and life is flexible and things aren't for never.
3) This confidence was slightly shaken by the small hiccough in dental insurance that does not want to pay for all that work I had done in February (before I went off my parent's insurance). A few things I realized during last night's ordeal:
A. I am a responsible adult who has saved money in case of emergencies like this.
B. But I am still a poor responsible adult, and this bill sucks up half of everything I saved over this year.
C. Oh god, I am never going to stop owing someone money and I will never go to grad school and I will spend the rest of my life wearing broken sunglasses and eating stale bread from Marc's.
D. Becky and Dave Greene will not let me starve to death and they can probably help fix this.
4) The above scenario also helped me realize that, while I haven't noticed a huge difference in my new medicine, it must be doing something for me because if I forget to take it I cry a lot about trivial things. Like dogs being at the pound, or important Harry Potter related decision-making, and dental bills.
5) Ryan Kish lives so close to me right now, and we are making traditions and this next year will be much better than the last. Which everyone promised me. So cheers to that.
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Little Bee -Chris Cleave
This is one of those books you have to read, without any summary or preface, and just experience as you go. I finished it in two days, and right now it is my top book of 2015.
Thursday, August 13, 2015
Today I love: Comfort
Lately, I have been feeling scarce.
There is a book, 29 Gifts (it's not that great so don't bother reading it, I'm about to follow up the main points) where a woman becomes terminally ill and decides she will do something for someone else every day. She discusses how generosity makes you feel more alive, whereas scarcity (giving of yourself to excess) depletes your energy. The difference is often your own attitude.
For whatever reason, I've had trouble resetting my attitude lately. I'm unfocussed and grumpy at work, so I come home and have a poor dinner and get a bad night's sleep, then I wake up the next morning grumpy, etc. Earlier this week I realized that I was probably not that fun to be around, and maybe it would be good for both me and my coworkers if I took a day off.
Then tonight, I went through my notebook from when I was in the Netherlands. Which is the emotional equivalent of watching Chinatown.
It starts with such naive hope and optimism and every page gets slightly gloomier and more ominous until eventually you see the exact moment where I broke. I did not snap. Snapping is something you do when you're hard and angry. The Netherlands broke me.
But it was exactly what I needed to recharge, because sometimes all you need is a little reminder that you are living exactly what you needed a year ago. Sometimes I'm lonely in my apartment, but I'm never more than an hour away from one of my favorite people. I might get bored, but that also translates to "super comfortable" which is something I needed in excess a year ago. Sometimes my job is hard, but it's never, EVER the kind of hard that a language barrier produces.
So holy perspective, batman.
Tomorrow is going to be the best day, because I will spend it at home, where I have become so comfortable and happy I've convinced myself I shouldn't like it. I have milk in gallon jugs and air conditioning and I can read the labels to figure out which bottle is shampoo and which is conditioner. I can stay in bed and watch tv, and no one will care, or I can leave the house to go to a movie, and still no one will care.
I feel much less scarce and much more grateful for my beautiful, kind, comfortable life.
There is a book, 29 Gifts (it's not that great so don't bother reading it, I'm about to follow up the main points) where a woman becomes terminally ill and decides she will do something for someone else every day. She discusses how generosity makes you feel more alive, whereas scarcity (giving of yourself to excess) depletes your energy. The difference is often your own attitude.
For whatever reason, I've had trouble resetting my attitude lately. I'm unfocussed and grumpy at work, so I come home and have a poor dinner and get a bad night's sleep, then I wake up the next morning grumpy, etc. Earlier this week I realized that I was probably not that fun to be around, and maybe it would be good for both me and my coworkers if I took a day off.
Then tonight, I went through my notebook from when I was in the Netherlands. Which is the emotional equivalent of watching Chinatown.
It starts with such naive hope and optimism and every page gets slightly gloomier and more ominous until eventually you see the exact moment where I broke. I did not snap. Snapping is something you do when you're hard and angry. The Netherlands broke me.
But it was exactly what I needed to recharge, because sometimes all you need is a little reminder that you are living exactly what you needed a year ago. Sometimes I'm lonely in my apartment, but I'm never more than an hour away from one of my favorite people. I might get bored, but that also translates to "super comfortable" which is something I needed in excess a year ago. Sometimes my job is hard, but it's never, EVER the kind of hard that a language barrier produces.
So holy perspective, batman.
Tomorrow is going to be the best day, because I will spend it at home, where I have become so comfortable and happy I've convinced myself I shouldn't like it. I have milk in gallon jugs and air conditioning and I can read the labels to figure out which bottle is shampoo and which is conditioner. I can stay in bed and watch tv, and no one will care, or I can leave the house to go to a movie, and still no one will care.
I feel much less scarce and much more grateful for my beautiful, kind, comfortable life.
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
Me and Earl and the Dying Girl
Normally, I post my favorite quotes when I finish a book, but this was such an awful piece of trash there is not a single sentence worth mentioning. I'm only even mentioning I read the book to convince you not to waste your time.
How anyone could compare it to any John Green novel, I do not know.
“If after reading this book you come to my home and brutally murder me, I do not blame you.”
How anyone could compare it to any John Green novel, I do not know.
“If after reading this book you come to my home and brutally murder me, I do not blame you.”
Good.
Tuesday, August 11, 2015
Vacation Days
The best part of my canceling my trip to Costa Rica is that I now have 6 beautiful vacation day opportunities that must be used up by the end of the year. The real bummer in being 23 is that realistically I have no money to go anywhere for vacation and my friends are equally financially challenged (and in most cases don't have vacation days on top of that). The bummer of being single is that any stay-cation plans start to feel like they should be narrated by a Liz Lemon diatribe. I come home from work and marathon Parks and Rec any day! Now I just have a fancy bed to do it in! Want to go to the library? Easy fun! Shopping? The mall is 10 minutes from work.
Maybe that's the secret. Every day after work is my own personal vacation. That would be a fun way to look at this!
I'm taking this Friday off just because I need the time away from the office to recharge, regardless of if I just hang out at the library or help Ryan with his move (eep!)
In the meantime, what do I do with the next 5 days?
Ideas:
1) Visit Tyler in NYC. This is a given, it's happening
2) Visit Cousins in LA. This seems less likely, as I am running out of time and I thought I would be able to wait until next year to do this
3) Visit Chicago with Kayse and watch some comedy gold.
4)Visit Breanna in Cincinnati to see the manatees
5) Go to the variety of lovely art and show offerings in Cleveland
What else could I do alone and with little budget? Peanut Gallery comments encouraged!
Maybe that's the secret. Every day after work is my own personal vacation. That would be a fun way to look at this!
I'm taking this Friday off just because I need the time away from the office to recharge, regardless of if I just hang out at the library or help Ryan with his move (eep!)
In the meantime, what do I do with the next 5 days?
Ideas:
1) Visit Tyler in NYC. This is a given, it's happening
2) Visit Cousins in LA. This seems less likely, as I am running out of time and I thought I would be able to wait until next year to do this
3) Visit Chicago with Kayse and watch some comedy gold.
4)Visit Breanna in Cincinnati to see the manatees
5) Go to the variety of lovely art and show offerings in Cleveland
What else could I do alone and with little budget? Peanut Gallery comments encouraged!
Sunday, August 9, 2015
Some things for this Week/Month
1) Busy weekends - It seems like I've been running around a lot with all sorts of commitments, which is a good thing, but I miss having a lazy day once and a while. More importantly, I miss having someone to spend lazy days with. How long after graduating college until I stop missing college?
2) Keeping Motivated - No matter how busy I stay, the more bored I seem to get! Maybe it's because my projects are things like building bed frames and ordering a mattress and finding a new optometrist.
3) Trying New Things- I started a new show, I started a new book, I went back to the gym, I'm practicing cooking! All this feels like a dejavu of when I first moved here and didn't know what to do with myself. Can you backslide out of adulthood? For a while there I really feel like I had it worked out, but at some point I started going backwards.
I think maybe I'm frustrated that I haven't made more progress for the effort I've put in. I took an online class, I started dating a guy (boo, bad idea), I made more of an effort to get out of the apartment. All those things you do to settle in a new home. But it's been almost a year later, and I think I was happier when I was just marathoning Arrow and having popcorn for dinner.
I will say that the bright side of all this is having the english majors all back together again-- not physically, but putting us all on the same side of adulthood has made it a lot easier to stay connected. And my zeta family remains closer than ever. So for all the loneliness, I am luckier than most in that I got to keep all those very important people even when we all went separate ways.
2) Keeping Motivated - No matter how busy I stay, the more bored I seem to get! Maybe it's because my projects are things like building bed frames and ordering a mattress and finding a new optometrist.
3) Trying New Things- I started a new show, I started a new book, I went back to the gym, I'm practicing cooking! All this feels like a dejavu of when I first moved here and didn't know what to do with myself. Can you backslide out of adulthood? For a while there I really feel like I had it worked out, but at some point I started going backwards.
I think maybe I'm frustrated that I haven't made more progress for the effort I've put in. I took an online class, I started dating a guy (boo, bad idea), I made more of an effort to get out of the apartment. All those things you do to settle in a new home. But it's been almost a year later, and I think I was happier when I was just marathoning Arrow and having popcorn for dinner.
I will say that the bright side of all this is having the english majors all back together again-- not physically, but putting us all on the same side of adulthood has made it a lot easier to stay connected. And my zeta family remains closer than ever. So for all the loneliness, I am luckier than most in that I got to keep all those very important people even when we all went separate ways.
Tuesday, August 4, 2015
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