Just some things today

1) Thanks to everyone who sent me a message about my 2015 goals- Holy wow, did that get a lot of reactions. I had no idea so many people even read this blog, but I got an awesome amount of suggestions from some really lovely supportive people. I feel ready to tackle the next few months.

2) Apartment Hurrays: I have a table now! I feel much more motivated to make real food now that I can sit at a table and eat it instead of sitting on the floor or the couch. My parents also bought me a chaise lounge (chaaaaaaise) which really classys up the place. Finally, candles. They are the best. I've just been burning ones in jars, but I got cutesy tea light holders for Christmas that I'm excited to break out once I get through the big jar ones I have.

3) Apartment Boos- I'm convinced my shower is trying to murder me. It refuses to stick to one temperature, and for whatever reason it is capable of a scalding hot that could put you into a coma. It really is unnecessary. The result is me dancing and shrieking and adjusting the levers until I just give up.

4) Writing Deadlines- I'm working on another writing project! My friend Mitch and I have an elaborate system of keeping each other accountable and it feels good to be stressing about meeting another writing deadline and feeling frazzled about the first draft. I probably won't talk much more about it, but I am writing again!

Quarterly Resolutions!

I'm not big into year resolutions, because like most everything else in my life, I don't have the focus to commit to anything that long. So once again, my quarterly resolutions:

Measurable Goals:

• Finish first 2 lessons of Rosetta Stone (Spanish)
• Lose 10 pounds a month
• Go without fast food (that means chicken nuggets, even homemade) or alcohol, with one cheat day a month
• Learn to cook 3 different dishes a month (this is the one I'm most worried about)
• During the week, no more than 7 hours of TV time (this does not include group movie nights/going to the movies)
• Read 15 books (I'll post the list on another blog)
• Write for 3 hours a week with no distractions, not including blogging or journaling
• Write in the blog or journal once a day. find a routine that works

Non-Measurable Goals, but still to think about:

• Continue to develop my adult wardrobe and dress for my shape
• Find some kind of volunteer work to get involved in (even if at first this just means finding a church and helping out there)
• Once a week, find someplace new in my area and figure out how to get to it. Even if I'm not comfortable going to restaurants alone, I still want to know where everything is when I do have guests.
• Spend NO MONEY on myself, excluding groceries and bills. The exception to this rule will be pre-determined rewards set for myself based on weight-loss goals. For example, I would really really love a cardigan from modcloth, so once I lose 10 pounds I will go out and get myself one.
• The other exception to this rule being necessary exercise equipment; namely, hand weights. Cross your fingers that my running shoes hold up, because they're starting to get old too. 
• Learn how to rock more shades of lipstick and look confident doing it.

So those are the goals for January to March! On April 1st, I'll check back in to see how I did!

Lindsey Stirling

I was making family members mixed cds for Christmas and totally forgot this existed, and now I can't stop rewatching the music video. Enjoy.

My Liebster Nomination!

My friend Megan nominated me for the Liebster award, which is given by bloggers to bloggers to help promote community and connect more bloggers to each other! It started a few years ago, so getting tagged right now feels like I have finally started to win at this. 

Anyway, I answer the questions she gave me, I pass it on to other blogs I follow with less than 200 followers, and then they answer the questions I give them! Pretty simple, but still fun. 

1. What book has left a lasting impression on you? Looking for Alaska. It is the closest thing to my personality as a book. I identify with almost all of the characters and their struggles, and it tackles some incredibly tough subjects with tact and grace without sacrificing youthful joy. "It always shocked me when I realized that I wasn’t the only person in the world who thought and felt such strange and awful things.”
2. Share a goal you have for yourself for the next year. I have lots of goals, but none of them yearly; usually I got by a few months or a few years. I'm posting a blog on this shortly. I guess one goal would be to create a new life for myself in Austintown without severing the ties of my old life. 
3. Without any limitations, if you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go? Tricky. I guess if there are no limitations I would pick the most expensive place to travel, so that I could save my money and spend it on other places when I didn't have this travel-genie granting my wishes. New Zealand? Australia? 
4. What is your favorite quote to live by? "The best way out is always through." -Robert Frost, or, “Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength.” -August Wilson
5. Share your top song of 2014. I think maybe Casual Affair by Panic at the Disco, just because it fits so many different moods. It wasn't my top song, but Rivers and Roads (by The Head and the Heart) might be the song that best describes 2014. 
6. When did you start blogging and why? I started blogging in middle school, although the blogs have changed with the purpose. I think when I started it was just to be heard, although eventually it became a way to create a habit of writing, to keep up with people, and then finally this blog, which was created to inspire me.
7. What do you always carry with you? i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)
8. If you could change the ending to any fictional work (movie, show, book, etc.) what would you change? How I Met Your Mother, easy. Give us the alternate ending and make it so. 
9. Who’s your biggest influence? Barbara
10. What’s the biggest change you’ve seen in yourself in the past year? A loss of hope. 
11. Share your favorite holiday tradition. Eating steak cooked outside on the grill, driving around to look at lights, and then watching The Santa Clause on Christmas Eve. 

I am too lazy to write new questions, so I pass these off to you, Barbara and Mitch, and you do the same!

'TIs the Season to be Jolly and Joyous... falala

There is not a single Christmas song that gets me more pumped for the holiday and uncharacteristically joyful than this. Once you get to the middle you can't NOT sing-a-long (including the "falalalas"). How do people who weren't raised on the muppets celebrate Christmas???

I'm Proud of My Friends!

There has just been a lot of craziness going on the past few weeks (and sometimes months) and I think some people I love need dues paid to them.

1) Law School Friends- You da real MVPs. Minzy and Alex, I do not envy you, but I sure am damn impressed. Congrats on making it through your first semester!

2) Seniors in College Friends- Is there a more stressfully bittersweet time? Amber, Breanna, Kayse, Ryan- try to enjoy it and not stress too much about what happens after graduation.

3) Employed Friends- This is a weird transition for all of us, but if you're making it work for you and keeping a positive attitude, know that I see it and don't for a second believe it's because it was just that easy. It's ok to admit you're going to be at 9 or 10pm now. Mitch, I especially love having you reinforce the struggle that is grocery shopping.

4) Unemployed Friends- I totally get it, but don't sell yourself short, don't get discouraged, and know that I am proud of the struggles you are going up against without giving up. Burt and Mike especially, you're awesome and if you aren't hired any day now those people don't know what they're missing.

5)Married or Pregnant Friends- WOW! I'm excited for each and every one of you, and have zero bitterness about your life and happiness. Just because I can't imagine being that grown up doesn't mean I can't totally admire what you're doing.

Anyway, so many of my friends are going through huge transitions, and I think we all get so sucked up in our own we forget that everyone is dealing with a lot-- so whatever your huge transition is, I'm going to try to be more aware and sensitive of it and celebrate those accomplishments with you.

I believe in staying connected.

Christmas Joy!

We had an office decorating competition, but instead of doing it by cubicle Marketing decided to team up and enroll our whole office in the competition. Check it out.

This is my cubicle; my manager is over the wall from me, and my coworker is just to the right of this picture.

It's hard to tell, but on the left I made a fireplace where our shelf unit is. Lots and lots of bricks to cut out and tape, and now anytime anyone needs any literature we have to life it all up. Pure silliness.

He did the Santa, and I did the elf.

We didn't win the competition, but we sure did win some Christmas spirit. Although now every time I open one of my filing cabinet drawers I get trapped in an avalanche of wrapping paper.

Top 5 Songs that Make me Weepy

5. Lua- Bright Eyes; Ok, just read the lyrics. This song is sad. If I'm being honest, probably something like 60% of Bright Eyes songs make me cry, or at least really sad the rest of the day.

4. For Good- Cast of Wicked; We sang this at Zeta events, and as a senior it was bittersweet. The same goes for Feels like Home. It's nostalgic and reminds me of people I love. Sometimes I got through it without crying just because everyone expected a senior zeta to cry, and I was too stubborn. Most of the time I just cried with my roommate about having to leave everyone.

3. Fix You- Coldplay; I'm not really much of a coldplay person, but this probably belongs even further up the list. It's so overplayed though, so now it's just sad instead of weep-inducing. The same goes for "How to Save a Life" by The Fray-- that song still makes me cry too, it just gets played so often that I wouldn't have been able to listen to the radio for all of 2005 if I hadn't tuned it out. 

2.Baby Mine- Dumbo Soundtrack; I can't explain it. Mom used to sing it to me when I was little, I remember that much, but as a child with separation anxiety I cannot think of anything sadder than this scene. Look at all the cute animals with their mom! A mother's love is so special! Sorry Dumbo, your mom is in jail. I'm crying right now just rewatching it.

1. Safe and Sound -Taylor Swift ft. The Civil Wars; This came out of the first Hunger Games movie, and in that context, I cannot get through the 10 seconds without crying. It probably never would have made my radar, but as a song that connects Katniss' empathy for Peeta, Prim, and Rue, it kills me. I will not apologize for strong feelings represented by fictional characters.

****edit:

I'm not sure which this one bumps or where it belongs in the lineup, but the mother's version of La Vie en Rose from HIMYM. Admittedly I'm already crying at the end of that episode, but even listening in the car it is impossible for me to sing along without choking up.

Things Making me Happy Today

1. I got my Library Card! Not only that, they were very friendly this time, and they even have a handful of designs to choose from, just like a gift card or a credit card. The library is huge, there's lots of room for just sitting around and reading, and they have lots and lots of books that I can take home now.

2. New Vacuum- I bought a vacuum a few weeks ago but it had a broken part. It functions as a very nice hand vacuum, but the pole to turn it into a real vacuum was what I needed. I complained to Bissell, and they sent me a brand new one that came in today. So now I have two vacuums!

3. Smoothies- I also bought myself a little blender (it's perfect because it blends your stuff in the to-go container, so you make a smoothie and then take it all with you) but I hadn't done any serious fruit shopping until tonight. Now I am enjoying a strawberry banana kale smoothie and wondering if I have to learn to cook anything else.

4. Purple Glasses- I bought a new pair of glasses online that came in today, and they are purple and I love them. That's really all there is to say about that.

Then VS. Now

COMPLAINTS:

In college, I would send emails to professors with concerns about my grade and how I could fix it.

As an adult, I send emails to Bissel to complain about my vacuum and how they can fix it (answer- I'm getting a new one!)

GROCERIES:

In college, I usually grabbed some cookies and liquor, and maybe some fruit. Usually at giant eagle, usually at like 11pm.

As an adult, I keep track of when almonds will be on sale. Most of my shopping is done at the dollar general, on my lunch break. 

MAIL:

In college, it was care packages and cards from my family.

As an adult, it is still those things, except when it is a bill. 

EXERCISE:

In college, I walked everywhere and somedays spent two hours in the gym. 

As an adult, I sit in a chair all day and then barely stay awake for a 30 minute run. 

NUTRITION:

In college, I didn't. 

As an adult, I'm trying harder, but still no. 

MONDAYS:

In college, I was excited for HIMYM.

As an adult, I'm excited for the sales ad.

MONEY:

In college, I had none.

As an adult, I still have none, but can pay for the things I didn't pay for in college. 

WORK:

In college, I was never done studying or writing or being in class. 

As an adult, I get to be done at 5 every day and not think about it again until 8 the next morning.

That time of year...

Favorite cover of my favorite Christmas song goes to Versaemerge. Even if bro on the right isn't as dreamy as he thinks he is.

Comedy Growing Up

Every so often when I'm going through autobiographies or even just talking to my friends, I feel like I missed out because I didn't watch a lot of the classic sitcoms growing up (I've never seen an episode of Seinfeld). My family was bigger into music appreciation than making sure I had a well rounded tv education, but there are some exceptions that I think explain some of how my humor developed.

1) Pee Wee's Playhouse- We had almost all the episodes on VHS, and I have seen every one of them. It's quirky and different and hilarious all in it's very own way. I don't think as an adult you can get into Pee Wee quite the same way without adding the nostalgia, but I love it.
How did this shape me?: I think yelling is funny (which is hilarious because I hate loud noises and loud people, but yelling to be funny always makes me laugh. It's also probably why I like Will Farrell sometimes). It also gave me an appreciation for the boldly weird.

2) Dr Demento- or rather, the individual artists in his collections. I was raised on songs like "Poisoning Pigeons in the Park' and "Dead Puppies aren't much fun" and "Fishheads," which again, I'm not sure you can appreciate if you weren't raised on the weirdness.
How did this shape me?: Mostly I think it gave me an appreciation for macabre humor.

3) Weird Al- I think he remains pretty well and relevant, but his music inspired a lot of poorly written covers and made up songs in the Greene family. He was so clever, and most of his music came from songs I didn't know the originals of (I still remember hearing Like a Virgin for the first time and still singing Like a Surgeon). 

How did this shape me?: It introduced me to the world of parody!

4) The Muppets- The Muppets were probably the first variety show I ever saw, and they have been a staple in my house my whole life. You never grow out of the muppets. I couldn't even begin to list everything I learned from them. 

Favorite Comedy Moments: Swedish Chef, Literal News Anchor, Lew and his Boomerang Fish, Statler and Waldorf's heckling, and Sam the Eagle always being a stick in the mud. 

5) MST3K: A bunch of robots and a guy heckling really bad old movies. This is actually what it's like to watch a movie with The Greene's anyway, but having it done for us is still hilarious (you just have to skip through the parts in between when they're in their spaceship). A bunch of the movies are on youtube for free, so if you haven't seen them grab some friends and enjoy. These are the best movies for talking over and heckling with. I recommend The Horrors of Spider Island.
How did this shape me?: I don't think it gets to take responsibility for my love of heckling (that probably goes to my uncle PAG) but it was still there. Comedic timing, that's probably something it should have credit for.

BONUS:
I don't know where to put Ray Stevens (was he part of a Dr Demento collection somewhere?), but he always makes me laugh. I should have done this for a talent show. I love Clyde the Camel.

Quote of the Week

“You can be shaped, or you can be broken. There is not much in between. Try to learn. Be coachable. Try to learn from everybody, especially those who fail. This is hard. ... How promising you are as a Student of the Game is a function of what you can pay attention to without running away.”                                                                                                                                                           -David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest

Christmas Special Hosts I Want to See

After starting to get into the intro-level of Christmas specials my family watches every year (usually we start with Harry Connick Jr. and all the sing-a-longs, then get to the real stuff) I mentioned not liking the Michael Buble Christmas concert, and wished that there could be something new and fresh and fun for my generation. My uncle asked who I thought could make that happen, and this is my answer.

1) Neil Patrick Harris- He would bring the best cameos, he can sing, dance, and act, and (I think) he has the kind of humor that could bring whimsical joy for a holiday special. Plus, he is loved both as a person and as his characters. And he does magic tricks.

2) Jimmy Fallon- All for the same reason. He has both talent and personality, and the spirit to make almost anything fun and silly. My parents vote him to #1 because they think he has a warmer personality for a family-friendly holiday. He would also have some rocking cameos.

3) Ben Folds- Because it seems like variety shows are more often done by musical artists, and I was struggling to think of one that fit all the criteria (talent, public personality, fun to watch). After being one of the judges for The Sing Off, I think he's a public enough figure that people would be into it, and watching someone play piano is always more fun than watching someone play guitar. Plus, he has that casual Nashville Superstar vibe going for him.

• My parents think that if we were country music people, we would also probably include Garth Brooks, but I don't know anything about him. Isn't there another country music hunk everyone loves right now that visits kids with cancer and dances with little girls on stage? That's definitely someone. He's probably good too, if you like that kind of thing (maybe he already has one and I didn't know). 

4) Zooey Daschenal- I give up, I like her. I already sort of identify her as a holiday person after Elf, and she can sing and act. She is disarmingly adorable in her "I'm stuck in the 1950s" kind of way. 

Also, I was just annoyed I couldn't think of more women I would want to see (I purposely didn't include Tina and Amy--at some point, it would just be a series of SNL specials) and I don't think Anna Kendrick will be as timeless as I'd like. Who are the talented women that can sing and act and are a timelessly family-friendly public figure? 

Is there a job somewhere that includes only writing Christmas Variety Shows? Maybe I'll just write the shows, and then once I become super successful and famous I'll call these people up and let them know the work is already done.

Neil Patrick Harris

I'm almost done with his autobiography, and I'd like to remind everyone that this happened:

Hump Day.

These blogs have gotten so lazy lately, and I apologize. My brain is so mushy and my focus is so awful. I need to read a book.

1) Vacuum Cleaners- I have a little hand held one from college, but today when I used it it sucked in all the dirt and spit it back out. Everywhere. I was not amused, but I'm pretty sure I have no one to blame but myself because I remember this being a problem before and I was too stubborn to throw the stupid thing away.

2) Adult Life Update- I check the weather before I get gas, I check coupons before I buy groceries, and I haven't had chicken nuggets in 3 weeks. Also, it feels like a successful day if I go to the gym and still get to bed by 10:30.

3) Christmas Trees- One of my coworkers brought me a Christmas tree that she didn't use anymore so I would have some holiday spirit in my apartment. It was sweet and thoughtful, and I love the people I work with.

4) Skater Dresses and Full Skirts- Why has it taken me this long to just commit to this style? I wasted so many years not embracing my 50s housewife curves. I spent so much time hating Zoey Daschenal (I don't care enough to check how to spell her name: see, lazy) when I could be learning from her. Apologies to my waistline.

The Struggle is Imaginary.

I was given a flu shot over Thanksgiving weekend, and while I am super thankful to have it be so convenient (woot woot, middle class American-- or at least family member of the middle class) I hate them. I hate them so so much.

Here is Shot Manifesto: I do not mind the needle (unless it's anywhere near my stomach. I will probably never be pregnant or have a pet raccoon because of my fear of amniotic fluid tests and rabies shots). I DO mind whatever weird invader is being put into my system. It's an unreasonable double-standard because I will happily take any pill a doctor prescribes me, but it creeps me out to think of dead germs swishing around in my muscle. It isn't the shot that bothers me, it's the next few days when your body keeps reminding you with sore muscles that something is stuck in there that doesn't belong.

Flu shots freak me out the most because every year I have to wait around for 10 minutes after I get the shot to make sure I don't have a "reaction." What is the reaction we're waiting for? What is supposed to happen?? If I'm not about to become an X-man, I probably don't want to know. Then, they tell you that you might have flu-symptoms in the next 12 hours so I spend the whole day worrying myself into a fever. I didn't even really know what flu-symptoms were, so the first few years I imagined myself into a stomach-bug until I found out they weren't the same thing.

The past few years I've gotten the nasal mist, which is simpler because instead of having a sore arm you just get a snuffly nose, which is much easier to pretend is normal. This year, I got the shot with a "short needle." Instead of going into your muscle, it puts the vaccine under your skin in a smaller volume. It also hurts less, but clicks like a piercing gun which is its own kind of startling.

This long boring post all comes down to this one small inconvenience: My arm has an awful swollen red bump (like a hive, or a bug bite) where I got the shot, and it's super itchy but if I itch it it hurts and then I get nauseated. It's like a little flu-germ pool stuck in my arm and it won't go away. Picture whatever it is that makes you feel sick-- gory horror movies, seeing other people get sick, dead puppies-- then imagine that thing attached to your arm, and you can FEEL it wanting you to pay attention to it but you can't look.

Like I said, the struggle isn't real, it's imaginary.

Happy Birthday, Liam Sharp!

This little man is 5 years old today, and it is looking good on him.