Driving Stick

I had my driving lesson this morning. I can't read the street signs (except stop), and the rules are very different in the Netherlands-- if someone is coming from the right, they have right of way unless there are "shark teeth" painted on the street. So Franklin people, think about the intersection of congress hill and pone lane; if I'm pulling out from congress hill (like from the firehall towards bully hill) people on pone lane have to stop for me. It's quite the change. People here bike EVERYWHERE, also. It's a really well organized system for safe riding, as long as there aren't any stupid Americans on the road. So I have to worry about the other cars, the bus lane, and the bike lanes, while also following these new rules without being able to read the stop signs. The dutch also seem opposed to posting speed limits; apparently they are strongly enforced, and tickets are very expensive, but there is some type of formula to it I haven't worked out. It is boring to explain, so I won't, but just trust me; I don't really know what's going on as much as I would like to.

Also part of the driving lesson was learning to drive stick. His (the driving teacher's) was like a cheater 4 speed; he had access to all the pedals, so he could put it the clutch if I forgot to. So then I didn't know when I was doing it wrong because I didn't noticed I was getting help. I did learn about about all the previously mentioned tricky rules, but then he just gave me a book in dutch that I can't read and made me drive around a hundred traffic circles, which I do feel confident about now. His car also had a screen that told you when you should shift up or down, which I won't have. 

My twingo-- Dad has pointed out that it's like a little old french woman.

After my two hour driving lesson (I just kept thinking that I could have driven home from Cleveland in the time I spent in a car) I tried to get my own car to move, and it took me another hour just to get it turned around in the driveway. I was fussing with the stick shift, and texting dad, and looking online, and after lots of trial and error I finally found the stupid collar on the stick shift to get it in reverse so I could turn it around in the driveway. That was my only goal for the day, but it still resulted in a lot of weeping and panicking. 

Tomorrow, I will practice starting and stopping in the driveway and down the road. Vanessa also mentioned she can try to come home earlier and drive me around so I can continue to learn the rules of the road. Wish me luck! 

My favorite way to learn Dutch

Sure, Rosetta Stone is great, and immersive learning is efficient, but having google translate open and watching cop shows is the best. They have everything in subtitles so you can type what you're hearing into google translate, and it's always conversational dutch rather than the formal stuff you learn. You're hearing people speak casually and quickly, which is the real hard part, and cop dramas are so polite here that they just make me smile. 

As a bonus, I watch a lot of people break driving laws so I can learn what NOT to do!

Hup Holland Hup!

At the grocery store we go to, these little guys are everywhere celebrating the world cup. You get some when you go, so there are quite a few floating around here. I even have two now, because the girls had double of so many.

They're just little plush hamster keychains, very small. Mine is hanging from my doorknob. Hup means Go in dutch, and they have a song, Hup Holland Hup. It's like a song version of We Are- Penn State. Today I watched with the family as Holland beat Mexico, so that was exciting! I even cheered when they won. Of all the ways I will change this year, my disinterest in sports seems least likely to altar. But who knows!? All sorts of craziness could happen.

Afterwards we all sat at the table and I explained my rules and the parents translated for me. It seemed to go well, the girls understand my expectations, and if anything they seemed excited. I asked them if they wanted me to write it down, and so now we have the rules hanging on the wall for them and I can reference it if we have problems. We're also going to make a mailbox for fun ideas they want to do, and a mailbox for things to say when they're mad at me so they have a way to communicate without yelling. I also explained that this will be hard because we don't always understand each other, but I promise to practice my dutch if they promise to help me, and I will help them learn English. All in all, I think it went well, and in 2 weeks we will sit back down and discuss if there are any problems. 

Wish me luck tomorrow! I have an appointment with a driving teacher, which I was hoping to never have to do again. Stick shift, here I come. 

Dutch Culture of the Weekend

Weekends I have off, so hopefully I will be traveling and not blogging. Today we did some shopping to make my room more comfortable, and eventually I think we'll even paint it (turquoise or gray, of course) because they want it to really feel like my room. It's a lot like freshman year of University, where everything is new and you're lonely, but with more responsibility and way more comfortable living arrangements. And this time, I get a family!

Anyway, since there isn't a lot of exciting stuff to report for my day, I'm here to tell you about Joppiesaus.

Joppiesaus is the ranch dressing of the Netherlands. I had it the first day I was there; I don't even remember what Marie-Louise was eating, but when an 8year old offers you a taste of something on her plate, you take it. But they put it on everything. Cheeseburgers, french fries, chicken. It's the flavor of their potato chips. When I make popcorn for them, I'll probably find a way to put joppiesaus on it.

It tastes a lot like a mustard (I've actually never had mustard, but it tastes like how it smells and that's how the Maes family introduced it to me). You can find a recipe here and try it (if you use google chrome it will translate it for you). I can already tell it will be one of those things that I will go home and miss. I don't think I would like it if I was at home, but at this point I'm trying everything. I ate a cherry tomato yesterday! I enjoy riding a bike! I read subtitles! All this in less than a week. 

I believe in embracing change. 

5 Things today

1. I gave instructions to Anne-Rose and she listened and understood! Often, this is not the case (ok, always), but it happened today finally and it felt good. I feel like dead weight most of the time because Oma always has to help me speak to the girls or drive or do basically start anything. I don't feel like I'm able to do my job, which makes me feel like I'm wasting their time, and I'm still so tired in the morning. But today I could tell the difference between when I started 3 days ago and what I understand now.

2. I rode a horse today! It was also nice, because the girl at the horse riding lessons place spoke english so I got some basics I could understand. The Maes family offered to send me to riding lessons, and then they bought me all the gear I need. It was insanely generous, and I am so thankful for the experience. We are also going on vacation to Italy in August, so there's another. Maybe it would be fun to keep a list of all the things that I got to do or experience every month as a project?

Marie-Louise with the picture we drew together of today. She asked me if I knew what a luftballon was so I could draw it. Thanks Nena, every word counts. 

3. We had pannekoeken for dinner today. Essentially dutch pancakes, with (sometimes) meat in them. Holy yum. A culture that has a designated breakfast food that is meant for dinner is alright with me.

Mine didn't have mushrooms in it, but this is what it looks like. 

4. Everyone here that speaks English speaks British English, so even without being in London I keep picking up British phrases. When I come home and say bloody hell, people will think I'm joking, but I'm not. I remember going to Italy and thinking that nowhere else I could say" "ciao!" sincerely, and this will be the same thing.

5. Oma's boyfriend, Hans, who is my kindred spirit. He speaks pretty good English, but he also knows some spanish, so we just use whatever language we know. He tells the best stories, and gives great advice. He also told me he could immediately tell I was a "good one" because I have dark features that reminds him of Italians. So there's that. He wants to take me to an art museum because we both love art, and he can tell me about it. He is only here to visit though, so I'm not sure how much he will be around for things.

Practicing English

I spent several hours with the girls yesterday, and we have quite the language barrier to get over. I bought them these coloring books that also have worksheets in them, which I will start making for myself soon. This is Anne-Rose, the youngest, with her picture of our family. I'm turned around so you can only see the back of my head (and also much shorter than everyone else), so in another picture she drew me in a bikini.

Still trying to adjust to basically everything, so I won't have long blogs right away. There's a lot happening and a lot to figure out, and all my free time is spent learning Dutch. Still pretty homesick, which I expect will probably always be true, but I keep reminding myself that it will only get easier. 

Getting settled

Here is my room! It's downstairs, and the rest of the family is upstairs, but the house is divided strangely to me-- I have a bathroom across from my room, but my actual shower room is through the kitchen and dining room, and in the laundry room which is also a little like their sun room. It will just take me a few days to figure out the best way not to scandalize anyone on my way to the shower- I am thankful I brought my zip up hoodie at the last minute. 

This morning I woke up and the cleaning lady was here, but she speaks no English so we mostly just mimed to each other. It worked fine, and it's the easiest way to learn Dutch so far. I had breakfast and the two of us listened to Michael Jackson. It was a moment. 

I also realized that I have been using my lotion as face wash (I could tell something was weird about it, but then when I opened my lotion this morning I realized they were switched). Silly problems, easily solved. 

Less silly problem, the car they want me to drive is a stick shift and they don't seem nearly panicked enough about wanting me to drive their children in it. Luckily, school isn't far, and the girls like to ride their bikes, so maybe I can buy some time to learn. They also go on summer break July 11th, so as soon as I get into this routine it will just change anyway. I want to take them on outings though, and get myself around, so this is just going to be something I have to relearn how to do. Hopefully it's an easy clutch.

I keep reminding myself that so far, I haven't come across any problems I won't be able to solve with a little practice/effort/bravery. They haven't asked me to hold my breath for 4 minutes or run across lava, so I think I will be fine.

 They have asked me to read to their children, which is more my thing. So, for a 6 and 8 year old, what would you suggest? What were your favorite children's stories growing up that I can help them practicr English with? 

Goodbye, America!

It's almost time!

I fly out of Pittsburgh Monday at 7:30 (in the evening), then go to Detroit for a short layover and from there fly direct to Amsterdam. I'll arrive local time on Tuesday at 11:35am, where my family will pick me up and take me to their house in Boxtel (a little less than an hour drive).

I'll keep my blog updated once I'm settled and find my routine. In the meantime, I'll be fretting.


I believe in getting uncomfortable.

Movies this Summer

1) Neighbors-- I went and saw this twice, and loved it both times. It was silly without being outright dumb (at least not intolerably so), and honest without being overly sentimental. Do frat boys party and get obnoxious? Yes. Do they also have a sincere brotherhood and take care of each? Yes. It was a little ridiculous, but I left having had a good time and an appreciation of little Franco brother.

2) Godzilla- There was nothing wrong with Godzilla, but it was just another generic Godzilla movie. I didn't realize until after I left the theater that the main character is also the actor who plays kick ass, which explained why I felt like he was more adorable than anything else. After my Asian studies class this semester, I feel a little more endeared to Godzilla, but it would be interesting to get a body count on that movie. Sure, kick ass and the Olsen sister and their son survived, but basically everyone else on the west coast died.

3) Maleficent- I was going in hoping this would be awesome without any faith that it had a reason to be. I was right. The movie is more like Disney fanfiction than actual Disney, but Angelina Jolie was great and I loved her daughter's cameo in the movie (because no other little girl would be brave enough to face Maleficent). The rape-metaphor scene was awful to watch but also totally appropriate to the story, and I don't hate that we're going to a place where we rewrite the traditional princess story (can we just call it a "frozen" ending now?), but they also took the most bad-ass Disney villain and redeemed her, which I didn't really want. Maybe that's a reflection on me, but I wanted to leave her scary and evil.

4) X-men- Currently my favorite of all the summer movies. James Macavoy stepped up his game, and it's like he just walked around with eyes brimming with tears the whole movie. There was also considerably less weird poses to indicate mutant power being used, which was my main complaint with First Class. I won't say much more about it, other than if you haven't seen this yet you need to.

Totally agree, Michael Fassbender. 

5) TFiOS- I'm going to see this today, because I've been wary about wanting to see something that will make me weepy. Seriously, just holding the book or thinking about going to the movie makes me want to cry right now. I actually like Shailene Woodley, and the fact that John Green loves it makes me confident that it will be just as good as everyone says. Bonus points for the filming they did in Amsterdam!

3 Things I Loved this Weekend

1. Getting to see the English Majors! We went to a movie, kayaked down french creek, tried lots of different restaurants, went on a tour, played games, and conquered an angry mob. It was so great to see them before I left, and reassuring that we really are a family of friends that will stick together. As an added bonus, my aunt, uncle, and cousins from state college came to Franklin to see me. I cannot stress enough how much stress that relieved for me. I have a list of people I want to see, and I couldn't figure out a way to make that travel day fit in the schedule, so having them come to me made me a lot less fretful. So thanks to everyone that drove to Franklin to see me one last time.

2. Father's day! I will not say that I have the best father ever, because that's annoying. I will say that I have the best father for ME, and that some of the best parts of myself are the parts I got from my dad (I'm talking about my stubbornness, my ability to play devils advocate, and my intolerance towards passive aggression; not my stupid cowlick). I love my dad, both for his serious, batman side, and his goofy side. I always think of him like this:

3. Orange is the New Black-- I'm two episodes away from finishing, and while I still love the show, I'm a little disappointed in the characters this season. (spoilers) The episode where Piper gets her furlow, and the black women get loud and obnoxious just kind of grossed me out. Taystee especially bothers me, because they wrote her to be a smarter and more sensitive character than that. I love what they're doing with Poussey, but I don't understand why we've started unraveling some of these other women of color into generic versions of themselves.
I think part of my issue is that I'm almost finished with the book, and where Piper Kerman went out to create a memoir and reveal what actually happens, the show mostly just sensationalizes it to what the traditional prison story is. I'm not shocked, and I really don't have a problem with some of what they add just for the sake of story (ie, in the book Alex isn't in the same prison and there's no contact, both Larry and Piper's family are supportive and understanding, there is no lesbian activity at all in Danbury, etc) but it does kind of ruin the intent of the book.

Mary Oliver

“I want to think again of dangerous and noble things.
I want to be light and frolicsome.
I want to be improbable beautiful and afraid of nothing,
as though I had wings.”

I don't want to argue gun control laws.

My newsfeed says that a high school in Oregon is (or was earlier this morning) under fire, that police are rushing to the scene, and that the news outlets don't really have an idea of what's going on. I tried doing some research, and it seems like that is the case in all of these.

What I found was this site that suggests that the mass shootings have not become more common, they're just more reported on. I didn't like the argument it took-- that somehow, the consistency makes it ok, and that alarmists are to blame for people getting so upset-- but it wasn't the first time I had read that perhaps what's on the rise is interested journalists, not shooting sprees. I don't think this makes it better; if anything, it's disappointing. There's a chart on the site worth looking at that lists how many killing sprees there have been every year, and if it was supposed to make me feel less upset, it failed. The only bright side to that is that this is an issue thats finally getting more recognition, even if it all is politicized.

There's also this site that claims Russians have fewer guns but far more homicides. I could talk all day about how interesting I think this is-- our right to bare arms is there so citizens can go against their government (ok, that's grossly oversimplified), but here is a country thats dictatorship has prevented their citizens from owning automatic or semi-automatic guns, require extensive background checks and licensing for handguns and shotguns, yet they still have a problem. I don't think the issue is gun control. I think the issue is murder control.

Gun laws have not gotten laxer over the years. While we aren't passing a lot of laws to make them stricter, it isn't any easier to get a gun. According to this site (which is what the first site I posted references) over three quarters of the killers in mass shootings since 1982 purchased their guns legally. I don't disagree that there is an issue in this, that these have been legally sanctioned weapons.

But I don't want to worry about gun control laws. I'm not saying we shouldn't; I'm saying that I, personally and selfishly on this day in this space of my personal blog, Paige, do not want to worry about gun control laws. I want to worry about people. If the websites about Russia are true, and the statistics of murder in other countries with stricter gun laws are true, then I want to worry about people. I think we get into a box of arguing politics, and how do we prevent this, and it feels like we're treating a lot of symptoms because it's easier than treating the illness.

There is something wrong with people. I don't know what it is. Claiming mental illness is over simplified, again; I have a mental illness, and I'm not going to shoot anyone. Promise. "Mental Illness" is about as vague as saying a person has allergies-- does that mean they can't be in a room with peanut butter, or that they get the sniffles in April?

I don't have a solution. I'm not even sure I have a point, other than I'm tired of people talking about gun laws. I don't think the issue is people that want to have guns, it's people that want take lives. When we start discussing that, and how to fix it, I'll be more interested in the discussion.

This Weekend

My last weekend in Ohio! I got to visit Ryan and go to Melt (which is delicious-- a gourmet grilled Cheese place that is the pride and joy of the area), stay in Berea and see some Zetas, go to a wedding, and stay with Kayse in Kent. 

I forget what Ryan got, but it was much fancier that mine-- I just had grilled cheese with fried egg in it. Still awesome. 

Little lives in a house in Berea now, and it was nice to see her and have no plans. Usually when I come up I have to be running around to do things, so having time to just sit on her porch and walk around the mall was so nice. 

Just being in Berea felt awesome too-- I went on a walk around campus since I didn't really have time to before I left. It was bittersweet. 

Liesl got married! I also have a really cute photo strip from everyone that graduated with us going into the photo booth, so I'll have to post that later once I unpack. The ceremony was beautiful, and we managed to have it outside and squeeze right between the storm. 

I stayed with Kayse before going home, and it was everything I wanted it to be. Kent is so cute and college-y, and I got to watch GoT with her family and finally start Orange is the New Black. It was nice to be reunited with her. 

I also revealed to her that my family members are pancake connoisseurs, and somewhere in that conversation realized that she had never tasted Nate the Great Pancakes, although she did know who Nate the Great was. So when the English majors visit this weekend, that will be handled. 

She also took me to an awesome toy store that had all sorts of nerdy adult toys too-- and everything bacon flavored you could ever not want. 

I can't remember what the book was called, but it was a collection of sections from famous books before the editor got to them. There was also a scene from the Girl with The Dragon tattoo where the tattoo artists asks if she's sure she wants a dragon, and she says no and walks out. The "editor" circled it in red and mentioned that maybe the title needed changed, if this was the case. It was al very silly. 

I DID IT!

Why I Love YA

One of my sisters (who is the reason I went Zeta, but that's another story for another day) blogged about her love of YA, and it resonates so fully with me and is articulated in a way that I never really found for myself. Her post was on TFiOS and my favorite author, John Green.

There is an ugly part of me that wants to play the hipster and remind all these tweens how I loved John Green before they knew who he was, and that I have loved him since Looking for Alaska. But that comes from years of being defensive that my favorite author was YA, and now I don't have to defend it, I have to share it. And Gina, in her perfect way, has helped me find peace without even knowing how much I needed to hear what she had to say:

First and foremost, John Green is my favorite author. If you know anything about me, you know that this is a huge assertion, considering I have hidden behind answers like Jane Austen and Fanny Fern and even Kurt Vonnegut my whole life. I’ve given the answers that will make me sound well-read and sophisticated, the answers that tell a certain story about me. But they’re not real. I do love Jane Austen and Fanny Fern and Kurt Vonnegut, but when I’m home alone and all I want to do is soak into a book, I don’t go for classics. No. I go for Young Adult. I go for stories written for an audience that loves stories. I go for John Green. 

And seeing this movie today justified my love of YA fiction. It made me proud of all the times I found the courage to admit that I read YA fiction in a room full of Literature majors and received that you-don’t-read-real-fiction scowl in return. Today, I sat in a movie theater full of people who unabashedly cried. During those two hours, we were a community.

I believe that novels should create community.

Tom Jones

Because that man was a fox. Seriously, I implore you to watch this video. Everyone knows the song, but have you watched his TV show? Because it is entertainment gold.

City of Heavenly Fire

"Because that which was new was almost always temporary. And that which was temporary broke your heart."

"Awe is well and good, but it’s poison to love. Love has to be between equals.”

“I think they’ll probably put that on my gravestone. ‘He Was Heterosexual and Had Low Expectations.'”


I realized why I love this series; it's the nerdiest, wittiest banter I've found since Buffy. None of it would make sense without context, which is why I didn't include it, but that's what makes it so fun.